Here's a  newspaper article I found. I read it everytime I'm down in the dumps. Read on:

Thinking With The Heart

If we look closely enough or think about it deeply enough, what causes so much human misery is  not so much what happens to people as what does happen to them. More than any event, our unmet demands from life bring about states of depression, feelings of rejection, in short, unhappiness. We make so many demands on life which, if not given us, would usually cause disappointment, sadness and, in not a few cases either depression or rabid anger. We make demands like we must get this promotion or we must have this standard of living or that our kids must be in the dean's list. If and when life does not give in to our demands, that is when trouble begins.

Another source of so much unhappiness is the souring of a relationship. But again, if we look closely enough or think about it deeply enough, what often causes a relationship to sour are the demands that friends or partners make on each other. Our disappointments stem from the other person's failure to oblige us on our demands that he or she does this or becomes this kind of a person for us. We are often unhappy not so much for what the other person is as for what the other person has not become for our sake.

Who makes all these demands? Since these are all reasonable demands, the culprit is our false ego, our lower self. He thinks with the intellect and justifies all his demands as reasonable. He will also make those demands for as long as he is convinced they are reasonable.I have worked so hard for  this promotion, it is not reasonable that I get what I have sacrificed so much for my children, is it not reasonable for me to demand that they take the course I want and get the kind of marks that I want? So goes our false ego's soliloquy.

In the span of two weeks, two high school students in a prestigious school in Manila were reported to have committed suicide. One of them was just a sophomore. You wonder what heavy burden made them take their life at such a young age. You wonder what demand their parents or peers or society made of them that they could not give.

Happiness comes from thinking with the heart. Obviously, we are not talking about the physical heart. We use heart here to mean the seat of our highest self, our true ego. This core part does not make any demands of us, of life or of others. This core part of us accepts us as we are, accepts others as they are and accepts all reality as a challenge to grow in love and truth and light. All reality, as in everything that we get or do not get in life, can be a source of happiness for the higher self. In the sense that it does not make any demands it is unreasonable. It is unreasonable because it does not think with the mind but perceives with the intuition of the spirit.

For instance, it does not demand that a child should get high grades. It encourages the attainment of high grades but will understand and help the child when he or she underachieves. It will work for a promotion but will look for the meaning of God's will in the event the promotion slips away. It will expect others to be kind but will not be reasonable and match unkindness with unkindness.

Since our higher self thinks with the heart, if given the chance, it cannot help but be reasonably loving. It will lead us to the higher real of love, truth and light.

This article is based on a book called "Rough Edges". The book is available at Sunstar P.del Rosario St., Cebu City and the Cebu Catholic Trade Center at P250. I'll be very happy if you could give me a copy as your Christmas gift to me. Thank you.